Qualifying darkness
Honoring the winter solstice
In my past celebrations of the winter solstice, I have focused on the message of optimism contained in the longer light filled days ahead. This year, I want to honor the dark a bit more. Darkness can be scary and sad, but it can also be deeply restorative and exciting. I am grateful to Sarah Kobrinsky’s solstice writing workshop that held space for me to explore and write the below.
Qualifying darkness
There’s the darkness of your bedroom where the lights have been turned off and our courage soars A sensual darkness where we fall into each other, the boundaries of your body and mine as fluid as the night that consumes us There’s the darkness of the desert which feels different than the darkness of a suburb A desolate darkness, beady coyote eyes like floating dimes. An exposed darkness The darkness of scarcity A six-day electrical outage, a single mom struggling to keep her three kids warm in the cruel midwestern winter Four bodies cuddled together by the fireplace but not in a cute nostalgic way, no fun or laughing in the air, only loneliness as my mom dealt with this without my dad There’s the darkness of fear Sometimes loud thunderbolts other times a quiet vignette dusting itself onto the image of your wonderful life The inconvenient darkness that gets in the way of receiving joy. An unwelcome swarm of ants crawling up and down your back even though you’ve asked them to leave really! nicely! multiple times There’s the quiet darkness of an evening snowfall misty flecks of snow buzzing towards the streetlights The comforting darkness of a sauna, a quiet stillness that cradles you in a restorative comfort like a final savasana
May you have a restful holiday season.
XOXO JZ